those who are honest and genuine, come hither. as i get to know certain people more, i just feel more sad. when i know someone is lying to me, or hiding how they truly feel or whatever, it's such a drag. but then i wait and see how long they'll take me for a jackass. it's either hilarious or depressing. i can count my real friends on one hand. i count my blessings on many though.
these last few weeks have been a serious nightmare. when i found out that my car got hit, i just sat stunned. somehow i knew it was going to turn into something stressful. but damn, even i didn't think it would knock me completely off of my feet. i lost my car. been staying at arielle's since it'd be easier to get back and forth to work. being so in need has made me into a burden for a few people. when you ask someone for help and they get irritated, it is the shittiest feeling. i hate being an inconveniece and detest feeling indebted. but it's shown me who i can really count on, which i guess i can appreciate, though the number is way smaller than i would've liked.
i had to quit guitar. i could cry whenever i think about it. the one thing i promised i would never give up no matter what. hopefully i can pick it up again soon. but i'm losing everything at once. square one is for the birds. dunno why this happened to me...
anyway...i'm gonna refresh craigslist for the millionth time. i'm almost at my worst right now. but if you run from my company when i'm this way, then stay the hell away from me when i get all my shit together and am my normal badass self. bitches.
