funny moment in walmart: guy asks for my number

i am a fat bastard. i will go to walmart for the sole purpose of buying these inexpensive yet delicious holiday snack cakes, and that's exactly what i did tonight with arielle. while i was in the aisle explaining to arielle why the cakes were so amazing, up walks this guy out of nowhere.

he was like mid to late twenties maybe? not attractive at all in my opinion, just average. anyway, he says that he noticed me in the aisle (i swear he only had enough time to see me for one second and then immediately walk over) and wanted to introduce himself, so he did. told me his name and that he was new to the area and was originally from AL or whatever. i didn't care, but he sounded official. he then said "i just wanted to reach out to you."

the first thing i think is, oh no. he's seen how tight my jeans are and thinks i'm some loose girl with poor morals and wants to direct me towards Christ or something.

but then he says to me, "i was just wondering if we could exchange numbers."

so i say in a bashful tone while covering my face, "oh sorry, i have a boyfriend and he wouldn't really like that :)"

"it's alright, i believe you. well then have a good one." umm and if he didn't believe me? twas a lie i told, but really, what could he do if i didn't want his number?

hah, reach out. reach out to grab that ass is more like it.

i think i figured out my biggest problem

notice how i said biggest. problemz, i has lots! XD

but in all seriousness...i think i've regressed back to age eighteen mentally. or maybe i've just been stuck there? but i feel like i'm finally starting to do all of the things that i should have been doing in college: partying and meeting new people, clubbing, and a few other things i probably won't be too proud of down the line that involves getting busted by cops haha, although experimenting owns. it's just that now i'm in a heap of boy trouble.

which is another thing, boys...that's the type i immediately go for. not men with goals that can provide for me, but childish guys who are attractive and have boyish charm but are ultimately douchebags who are just playin the field. they're always younger than me, but at least they're all legal.

meh...even though i know that i'm making a lot of mistakes, i don't regret them and i like what i'm doing right now. i should've already experienced all of this stuff, but i was straight up in love with someone throughout all 4 years of school and really had no desire to look at other guys or try anything new. i feel like i missed out on a lot of fun because of it...

oh well, i'll let you know how this jank goes.

i feel like a puppy.

yesh. i feel like a poor puppy that has multiple people kneelin and whistlin and makin cute kissy noises at me to encourage me to walk their way. buuuut i don't wanna walk to any of them. not so soon, anyway. i can't choose. i don't have all items and information necessary to make the correct decision...

if i use my head, i guess the answer is obvious. but what i feel is screamin somethin else. i dunno how much longer i can wait, and i dunno if they'll wait much longer. waiting sucks balls, especially if it's in vain. well...would ya wait for me? or have the courage that i don't have just yet? i wanna feel like i'm worth the effort anyway.

now if i could just say this to the people that it needs to be said to...hahaha, says betsy love. no pressure at all. it's only just spilling out of my ears!